A New Approach to Resolutions
New Year’s resolutions can be easy to make but hard to keep. Sound familiar? If you’ve ever set a resolution, only to watch it fade away by February, you’re not alone.
Here’s what the data reveals about our resolution habits:
By the end of the first week: Around 23% have already quit.
By the end of January: 43% have abandoned their goals.
By mid-February: Up to 80% of resolutions are forgotten.
By year-end: Only about 9% of people feel they’ve achieved their resolutions.
These numbers highlight a shared human struggle, but they also reveal something deeper: maybe it’s not about you or your willpower. Maybe the real challenge lies in how we approach change and how we trust and treat ourselves along the way. The focus should be on the emotional and psychological processes that drive real change.
Why Resolutions Fail?
Overwhelming Expectations
We often set resolutions that are too broad or too ambitious—think "get fit" or "lose weight"—without clear action steps. Our brain's reward system is better equipped to handle small, incremental progress rather than massive, all-encompassing goals.
Lack of Emotional Commitment
Resolutions based solely on logical, external goals (such as societal expectations, career advancements, or outward success) often neglect the deeper emotional and personal reasons for change, making them harder to sustain.
The "All or Nothing" Trap
When we fail to meet a goal early on, we tend to give up entirely. This mindset, known as “goal disengagement,” can halt progress altogether, leaving us feeling discouraged.
A Different Approach to Resolutions
1. Start Small 🌱
Most of us are familiar with the all-too-common cycle: We set a big goal, we’re motivated for a while, but then life gets busy, and we falter. What if instead of setting one giant goal, we broke it down into smaller, more manageable steps?
For example, if you want to be more active, begin by taking short walks. Just 10 minutes a day is a wonderful start. If you want to improve your mental wellbeing, start with just five minutes of mindfulness or journaling. It’s not about perfection—it’s about progress.
➡️ And here’s the key: when you miss a day or fall off track, be kind to yourself. This isn’t a race, and it’s not about reaching the finish line as fast as possible. Life will throw us challenges, and that’s okay. The goal is to get back on track gently, without judgment, and keep moving forward.
💡 To keep close: Small steps make change more sustainable.
2. Root Your Resolutions in ‘Why’ 💡
We often think of resolutions as something external—things like losing weight, exercising more, or getting a promotion. But what if we connected our resolutions to something deeper? What if instead of focusing on what we want to achieve, we focused on why we want to achieve it?
For example, instead of saying, “I want to lose weight,” you might say, “I want to feel stronger and more energetic to play with my children or to go on long walks with my partner.” Connecting to your ‘why’ creates an emotional anchor that gives your resolutions meaning and helps you stay motivated when things get tough.
📌 Reflection Moment: Take a moment today to think about your values. What do you want this new year to bring into your life? How can your goals align with what is important to you?
3. Embrace the Journey, Not Just the Outcome ✨
It’s easy to get caught up in the “end goal”. But in doing so, we often miss the beauty of the journey itself. This year, I encourage you to focus less on the destination and more on the process.
➡️ Ask yourself: How do you want to feel as you move through this year? Do you want to feel more grounded, more present, more connected to yourself and others?
Setting intentions that allow you to grow emotionally, mentally and socially will not only lead to fulfilling achievements, but it will also give you a deeper sense of satisfaction, no matter where you end up.
4. Incorporate Self-Compassion 💖
We are all human, and we all stumble. When we fail to meet our goals, it’s easy to feel disappointed or frustrated with ourselves. But here’s the truth: Setbacks are not failures—they are part of the process.
If you miss a workout or skip a meal, don’t let that one moment dictate the rest of your day, week, year. Instead of punishing yourself, treat yourself with the same kindness you would offer a dear friend. The way you treat yourself during moments of challenge will define how you grow, so let’s choose to be gentle with ourselves. It’s okay not to be perfect—it’s okay to be human.
💡 To keep close: Self-compassion helps you recover faster, learn from the experience, and keep moving forward.
5. Reflect and Adapt 🔄
The beauty of a new year is that it offers a fresh start. But it doesn’t mean we have to wait until next January to reflect and course-correct. Throughout the year, take moments to pause and ask: How am I doing? What’s working? What’s not?
Regular reflection helps us stay connected to our intentions and gives us the opportunity to make adjustments as we go. Instead of waiting for the end of the year to measure success, make reflection a part of your journey. This allows you to celebrate your wins and learn from the challenges along the way.
💡 To keep close: Progress is never linear—and that’s perfectly okay.
A Closing Thought 💬
Let’s aim to approach resolutions with kindness, patience, and a deep understanding that real change takes time. It’s not about a perfect year, it’s about a year full of growth, learning, and becoming more connected to who we truly are.
As you step into this new year, remember that you are not defined by your resolutions. You are a beautiful work in progress, and every step you take, no matter how small, is a step toward a more authentic, fulfilled version of yourself.
Here’s to a year of just being human!
Let’s Talk
Are you interested in exploring how you set sustainable goals and find practical strategies to achieve them? Are you ready to start the coaching process? Get in touch—we can discuss your needs and goals and find ways to personalize this process so you can get the most out of it.
