How to Deal with Uncertainty: 6 Tips From a Psychologist
This article was written in collaboration with The Wellness Society and it was first posted on their blog as an answer to one of their readers’ questions. You can find out more about it here: https://thewellnesssociety.org/how-to-deal-with-uncertainty-6-tips-from-a-psychologist/
Uncertainty is an unavoidable part of life. Dealing with the unknown can be difficult because it's strongly connected to our need for control and predictability. Keep reading to discover my top six tips for how to deal with uncertainty.
From an evolutionary perspective, humans are built to be able to anticipate danger, prepare for it, and fight against it. Think about the Stone Ages and what our ancestors had to go through. They had to fight predators, natural disasters, and be alert for everything that might pose a threat to their survival.
In today's world, we have different dangers that we have to adapt to, but our brains are still wired the same, and as a consequence, we will react with the same response.
When we are in ambiguous situations where we don't have enough information and don't know what could come next, our reptilian brain takes over and triggers the fight, flight or freeze response.
6 Tips for How to Deal with Uncertainty
1) Use Self-Compassion
People deal with uncertainty in different ways. In such a situation, take a few moments to sit with your emotions. Whether you experience worry, anxiety or stress, remind yourself that your feelings are normal and perfectly ok.
Sometimes we fight against what we’re feeling. Nobody likes to feel bad. But trying to push away or avoid our emotions only leads to intensifying them.
As a result, we may end up feeling worse. Other times we punish ourselves for our feelings, we label or even criticize ourselves which can lead to a lot of unnecessary pressure.
As an alternative, try to be compassionate towards yourself and observe what you are thinking and feeling. Allow space for your response. You’re only human and you have the right to your experience in that moment.
It sometimes helps to write down your thoughts and emotion so you can take a step back from them.
2) Practice Acceptance
Acceptance in this context means reflecting and trying to integrate the idea that life is uncertain and always has been.
Experiencing uncertainty is part of human existence and it’s something that you do every day, even though you might not be aware of it!
There are many things in your life that you can't be fully certain about or have complete control over, no matter how hard you try.
When you attempt to control events that are not within your control, you might end up feeling demotivated and even powerless.
In contrast, accepting that you sometimes have limited control and power over events and that you will have to live with moments of uncertainty can be very freeing. It will allow you the space to focus on the things that you do have control over, and empower you to choose how you want to manage uncertain situations.
3) Stay in the Present
Nobody can predict the future. No one knows what’s going to happen. We can't control what other people feel, think, or how they behave, and we can't control what life might throw at us.
Sometimes we overthink, ruminate, or try to distract ourselves by focusing on past or potential future events.
Instead, we can learn how to deal with uncertainty so that it doesn’t overwhelm us.
Mindfulness helps. Remind yourself to stay in the present and be mindful and conscious about what’s happening in your life right now, expressing gratitude as often as you can.
4) Reflect on Past Experiences
Past experiences, especially negative or difficult ones, offer us the biggest growth opportunities.
This might seem hard to accept when we’re going through them, but it can be useful to look back at what we learned and how we can use that in the future.
Think about one or two experiences from your past when you had to deal with uncertainty.
What did you learn about yourself?
What skills and strengths did you use in those situations?
Maybe you discovered you’re resilient, found out you have great organizational skills or realized who the people in your life are that you can count on. Whatever it was, you gained valuable insights. Those abilities and skills can support you in future uncertain situations.
5) Practice Self-Care Routines
In uncertain moments we might feel stressed, stuck or overwhelmed.
It's helpful to have habits and positive activities that can keep you grounded, allow you to take a break and recharge your batteries.
These should be simple activities that don't take a lot of time and that are easy to introduce in your everyday routine.
Ask yourself: What makes me feel relaxed?
What gives me a sense of relief?
What helps me to recharge?
6) Plan for Change and Uncertainty
In order to feel more prepared about unexpected things that can come into your life, make a plan that you can go back to, again and again in times of need, so you can feel more positive about how to deal with uncertainty.
If you take into consideration the strategies presented above, you can create a plan for yourself by finding the answers to the questions below.
Use your plan as often as you need to and modify and adapt it to the specific situations that you are going through.
How do I generally manage uncertainty?
How can I accept what is happing and show compassion and understanding towards myself and my emotions?
What skills and strengths can I use if something unpredictable comes my way?
What habits and self-care routines have I created for myself that can support me in uncertain times?
Who can I reach out to for empathy, emotional support, and practical help if I need to?
Dealing with uncertainty is hard. Use self-compassion and acceptance, stay in the present and practice self-care, learn from the past and plan for the future. Find strategies that work for you and practice them as often as possible so you can feel better prepared to deal with unexpected situations and events.
Let’s Talk
If you are having difficulty navigating uncertainty in your work, relationships or life right now and you are looking for impactul strategies to support you, get in touch. We can discuss your needs and goals and find ways to personalize this process so you can get the most out of it.
